In 2007...

[summer_jackel]

Chris became Kestrel and fully let go of his teaching career.

Lucy finalized her divorce from our ex.

Things went from almost the worst they've ever been in our triad, to the best.

I loved and lost, spectacularly. Learned a lot in the process. It's about equal parts suffering and gratitude at this point, I think.

GoH at Morphicon;

Had the temple come into my life, officially studied tantra (having unofficially studied it for years, but that's another story);

Felt really competent as an attorney for the first time; struggled to make everything else I like to do fit with it;

Lost Jhala, Tristan (mom's horses), Sage and Lady Randell (my parrots);

Had Kaya come into my life, possibly for the *rest* of my life;

Began to have poly work really well and in the process fully realized that I don't want to live any other way. Also somehow in that process, ended up with a personal life so varied and complex that I often find myself genuinely, bemusedly surprised by it;

Began identifying as a lesbian (albeit by kind of a funny definition, as I'm still happily sleeping with men);

Obtained a fancy corset and a Victorian ballgown;

Did some artwork I'm quite proud of;

Had my trio end up a quartet again, in one of the weirder ways I can imagine right now (with even more fun surreality on top of that) and;

Had the BBC film a documentary about my private life?!

...

OK, so it's been a significant year.

If I am to have a resolution for the year that follows, let it be to pay attention. To live mindfully and watchfully, and be fully aware that the person who looks back on the eve of 2010 may be someone I almost don't recognize...or that I could get hit by a truck tomorrow and end it right now. To be always present with the beauty and suffering and power of the world. To move through these days poised in readiness for taste and contact, scent and tone and vision.

Comments

[archteryx.livejournal.com]

And you had one small gryphon / big birdy come into your life. :>

You met me at the right time, I think. I was quite intolerant for many years about some things which are fundamental parts to you, until I sorted out my own issues. Nowadays I'm a lot more laid back about yiffy things. And good thing, too...you proved to me yet again why tolerance is so much better then fear.

*offers the sweet-hearted Jackel a hug*

[summer-jackel.livejournal.com]

*hugs da sweet 'teryx-griff scientist*
...wait, an *archaeopteryx griffin,* that would be *so cool*...
...ok, I'll file that away. Let's see, I was replying to you, right? ;D

I'm really glad that I met you, and that I met you when I did, then. It was a really sweet part of Morphicon. "you proved to me yet again why tolerance is so much better then fear"...wow, you know, that is one of the kindest and most powerful things a friend has said to me for some time. Tolerance and the overcoming of fear without judgment is one of my highest values, really, and I'm glad that I could...illustrate that, somehow, just by being. :)

I'm glad that we could meet together and become friends despite our differences; that's really a valuable thing. Just out of curiosity, what are the bits of which you would have been intolerant? poly? queerness? BDSM? Parrot ownership? ;D

regardless, I'm very happy to know you and have you still here in the coming year.

[archteryx.livejournal.com]

A long long time ago, the queerness; I was a Reagan Democrat (ie, homophobe) until I met a particularly sweet fox'taur that broke that forever, back in 1990.

But primarily, the BDSM. It rubbed me in all the wrong ways, and still does; the idea of forcefully dominating or hurting someone in the name of yiff will always be alien to me. It used to be so utterly alien that I couldn't maintain any sort of a trusted relationship with a BDSMer; they were just too much wildcards to be trusted.

That ended, just as the first, with knowing a few as very close, dear friends, a few scant years ago. The fear went away.

Nowadays I judge people by simpler and more salient things then what turns their loins on. Like their sense of loyalty, honor, trustworthiness, or just if they treat me like a human being or a jerk. There are certain other female furry artists I know that, despite being supposedly vanilla-straight, you are worth a thousand of, just because you treated me with decency and friendliness.

You are neither sinner nor saint, just a Jackel trying to make her way in a cruel world, and I will always be proud to call you flockmate.

[a-rowan-dryad.livejournal.com]

I am not sure exactly when I first ran into you, though I would say that it has been in 07 that our friendship has really taken off. :D

It has been an honor to get to know you. *hugs*

One question though... when did your triad become a quartet?

[summer-jackel.livejournal.com]

*hugs* oh definitely, I got to know you far better in 07 and I am most pleased thereby. :D

The quartet thing is a long story...we were originally a quartet with Lucy's ex, you know. The new situation is that the three of us are all dating the same girl, sort of. It started with Kestrel and Lucy dating her and me being *really skeptical*...our relationship has not been without drama and I didn't at all like the suggestion that my dating her would be a solution to any of it. (beware any solution to poly issues that involves adding another person...)

But, well, stuff happened and work was done, and she and I have come to terms with how we interact and what we seem to enjoy in one another...and, well, she's sweet and I appear to be kinda sorta dating her. So far, so good. It dosen't seem like it *should* be working, but it is, so I'm letting it.

[dustmeat.livejournal.com]

BBC documentary? What?

[summer-jackel.livejournal.com]

heh!!! Scroll down my journal to the 26th and 6th. It was bizarre and fun and bizarrely fun, but there's a studio doing a documentary about poly for the BBC and, uh, we're in it...

[allaine77.livejournal.com]

I'm still amazed that you're poly. I had no idea until you mentioned the documentary. I guess I haven't been paying enough attention to your entries.

You will let us know when it's aired, right?

Sincerely, Allaine